 | Conflict is any situation where the goals of two or more people are mutually incompatible. |
| It is also any situation where either party feels frustrated and thwarted. |
| Were you involved in any conflicts this week? |
| If so, where did they originate? |
| Were you the culprit or someone else? |
| Did you resolve the conflict or does it remain? |
| Conflicts are a frequent occurrence, however we need to monitor them and resolve them. |
If you feel you are in frequent conflict at home or work, gain a better way to manage your life and work now. Discover how to make better relationships a reality in your world. Make love not war will become your motto. Click here to find a great tape of managing difficult people, conflict and situations. Think you don't need it??
Causes of Conflict
There are many factors that can cause conflict such as...
| Differences: Cultural, sexual, education, age, language, religion, values, beliefs, politics, roles |
| Body language |
| No / Poor leadership |
| Procrastination |
| Conflict between personal / professional goals |
| Stress |
| Frustration |
| Burn Out |
| Ego |
| Person who wants or needs to be in control |
| Poor Planning |
| Change |
| Immaturity |
| Lack of understanding |
| Nepotism |
| Jealousy |
| Sabotage |
| Unclear roles |
| Poor goal definition |
| Scapegoating |
| Not valuing others |
| Fault finding |
| Apathy |
| Attitudes |
| Resistance |
| Inconsistency |
| Manipulation |
| Personality Conflicts |
| Overload (Personal & Professional) |
| Prejudices / Biases |
| Conflict of Ethics / Morals |
| Unfair Discipline |
Are You A Difficult Person To Deal With?
Check below to see if you have any of these difficult person qualities and characteristics. All of us have some. Are you?
| Too Aggressive | Selfish | Insecure |
| Moody | Passive-Aggressive | Rigid / Inflexible |
| Jealous / Envious | Pessimistic / Negative | Too Political |
| Lacking in Tact | Rude / Obnoxious | Opinionated |
| Self-Centered | Overly Religious | Close-minded |
| Inconsistent | Angry / Hostile | A Chronic Liar |
| Prejudiced | Too Bossy | Unforgiving |
| Irresponsible | Stubborn | Helpless |
| Dependent | Lazy | Sloppy |
| A User of Profanity | A Back Stabber | A Show-Off |
| Immature | Unkempt | Disrespectful |
| Loud | "Ignorant" | Non-Caring |
Note: If you see a lot of you in this section, focus on improving your communication. For a quick resource click each link to see an audiotape on Communicating Effectively and Managing Conflict and Difficult People.
© 1999-2010, Dr. Gloria "Jo" Floyd / 210-698-8700 (O) / 210-698-8701 (F)
Positive Ways To Handle Conflict
(Author Unknown)
Use a calm voice, sit and talk, listen, vent, cool off, use a 3rd party to intervene, discuss, communicate, set up a time to talk, think before you speak / act, be open different, reinforce positive characteristics / actions, respect for authority, non judgmental, ask for a solution, be discreet, mediator, one one one, discussion, group discussion use phrase such as "we have a problem", pray, team work, research, negotiate, be direct, follow up / conclusion / endpoint, compromise, open to suggestion,empathy, take control of the situation, be supportive, be honest, calm approach, follow policy and procedure, be consistent, patient, trust, good listening skills, open communication, assertive, timing - appropriate, positive attitude, reprimand in private, incentives, consequences, listen (hear), identify source, be fair, able to admit fault, focus on the problem, not the person, encouragement, recognize the positive, self reflection, self assessment, take responsibility, confront the issue, determine if there is a conflict open-constant-direct communication, know the ground rules, know your facts, take calculated risk, meet the other person halfway, be straight forward, get the whole picture, allow venting, cooling off, agree to disagree, be optimistic, pat on he back, bonus, raise, suggestion box, relax, self reflection, pause, relax, regroup, lighten up the situation, be a good listener, look/listen/love/learn, deal with it, put others first, firm but fair constructive criticism, be objective, let it go, etc.
